12 Haziran 2013 Çarşamba

Comments (2nd semester)

http://iremoyku.blogspot.com/2013/06/journal-4-gymnastics.html


Dear İrem,
I really need to express that your style is so good. The way you begin your journal makes us focus on the topic. You are interested in gymnastics and actually do it recently. So as I understand,you are interested in the topic you write,as well. There is not a big problem about your grammar and method. But I need to talk about some minor mistakes. First of all, ''you can do other sports easier.'' If I'm not mistaking,it must be ''more easily''. '' it leads you know'' > ''It leads you TO know.'' Except for two mistakes,I did not notice any mistake. I hope to see your next journals. Congratulations İrem :)


http://inci010911.blogspot.com/2013/06/journal-entry-6-article-raport-talk-and.html



Dear İnci,


I have read your journal and really like it. You explained the topic in detail and it appeals to me a lot. I appreciate the way you wrote your journal. Some minor punctuation mistakes can occur. I wanna to show you your mistakes that I noticed.  ''For instance, they share secrets. relate experiences, reveal problems and discuss options and these are necessary for their development.''  Here is a punctuation mistake especially about full stop and comma. I believe you are already aware of it and you can easily correct it. Except for this sentence, I did not notice any problem about your journal. You are really good at writing. Congra İnci :)



Dear Ebru,
Firstly, I watched the video you uploaded. It maked me smile because we are all so :) It can be definitely said that you are good at writing and expressing the ideas you hold.However, I wanna show you some mistakes that you made. ''In this animation video, our addiction to the Internet displays explicitly. '' I got what you tried to say,but your sentence should be like that : ''In this animation video, our addiction to the Internet is displayed explicitly.'' But of course it is not because of your lack of knowledge. In addition to this mistake, in one of your sentences, you wrote ''two of them''. But ''both of them'' would be better. It is about your word choice. Except for these two mistakes,your journal is excellent :) I hope to see your next journals and I really appreciate you :)


Dear Osman,
Your journal is really informative and thanks to you, I got more information about Kenan Sofuoğlu. He is really successful and you emphasized on it well. In spite fo your good writing,there some mistakes that should be corrected.First of all, ''He won lots of races and cups since then.'' Here is a grammatical mistake. As you know,if your sentence contains ''since then'',you should use perfect tense. In additiın, in your sentence : ''After he won the championship in 2010 he wore the Ottoman Bladder'', there is a punctuation mistake. You should put a comma between two sentences. Also,you should correct this sentence in terms of punctuation and spelling.>''He says because winners wear or do sth about their culture I decide to wear this bladder.'' Last mistake is in this sentence;''He lost his brother in 2002 than 2008 he lost his other brother and in 2010 he lost his father. '' You had better correct again your spelling. Except for them,I appreciate the way you expressed your ideas and congratulations Osman :)





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